when it's time to chime

   We took our antique wall clock from the auction room and thought deeply about where to hang this beautiful specimen. He has since looked down upon us from a vantage point above the stairs.

   I'm calling the clock he because of the lordly and obstinate way he  manages to conduct his time keeping assignments. He has no regard for our sleep patterns, daily appointments, visitors or  television programmes.

   Because our clock was displaying these traits we took him to an horologist /clock psychologist. 'He's very self willed' the expert said. 'You'll have to leave him with me for some timely behavioural therapy. I charge by the hour.' Although his stay in rehab cost a fortune, a more polished looking body and bright face returned to his wall space.

    For a couple of days his behaviour was impeccable. There were no missed hair appointments, we didn't arrive two hours late for a dinner party or get up at some ungodly hour in the night. At last our clock knew when it was time to chime.

   But old habits die hard and our delight turned to disbelief when we heard sixteen chimes when it was four in the afternoon and three when it was ten in the morning. At midnight there was a single chime followed by three and four alternately on the half hour.
  
   Our clock could be stopped forever and become an ornament, a bit like a dog whose been to the taxidermist -- a dead dog of course. But we don't have the heart to do this because this clock is no slacker, just a bit confused. It's now the forty seventh day of the month and the time has yet to be determined.